Tuesday, January 30, 2018
Tuesday, December 26, 2017
So I got an Online Boyfriend...
Most days I feel so broken because I can't relate to those body positivity movements. I'm just a size 16 but why is everyone making me feel like I'm morbidly obese.
I mean, I get I'm in a third world country and 16 is on the side of heavy but they make it sound like I'm grotesque...
I found a boyfriend. We have an online relationship. He can't go here and I won't go there. I showed him all of me and he liked me, size and all.
Then my siblings had to ruin everything saying what a sham it was for having a not real boyfriend. So now what?
I want to talk to him but how do I say it? We have an open relationship. It's not exclusive and it's all online. So am I searching for more because he made me feel special?
Still awkward here.
I mean, I get I'm in a third world country and 16 is on the side of heavy but they make it sound like I'm grotesque...
I found a boyfriend. We have an online relationship. He can't go here and I won't go there. I showed him all of me and he liked me, size and all.
Then my siblings had to ruin everything saying what a sham it was for having a not real boyfriend. So now what?
I want to talk to him but how do I say it? We have an open relationship. It's not exclusive and it's all online. So am I searching for more because he made me feel special?
Still awkward here.
Always the Fat Girl
Growing up, I was always the biggest kid.
But now that I reflect on it, I wasn't. Not really. I was the biggest in the family and they won't let me forget.
I'm a size 16 now. They make me feel like I'm size 25.
So when I go out, I tried to hide with a cardigan or corset...
But now that I reflect on it, I wasn't. Not really. I was the biggest in the family and they won't let me forget.
I'm a size 16 now. They make me feel like I'm size 25.
So when I go out, I tried to hide with a cardigan or corset...
Always the Awkward
So, this is more of a diary for me.
If you've stumbled upon this blog, go on and read. If you can relate, I'm glad. I hardly find people to relate to these days...
I've always been awkward. Since when? Since birth. My family always described me as someone super shy but when I make friends, I can't seem to stop talking to those friends. Then, the awkward distance comes. I guess you can only take me in small doses.
High School, my teachers push me to talk more. They made me do live reports and stuff to get me to talk. I learned to talk but that didn't take out the awkward in me...
College, I became feisty but still awkward. I just won't let people step all over me. That doesn't mean I wasn't socially weird. As always, people take me in small doses. Heck, family take me in small doses.
I'm now 32. I'm still awkward. I learned how to cope but I'm still awkward. I can walk in front of a crowd and host a gathering of hundreds, tell a speech, say my script but when the mic's away, I'm lost.
If you've stumbled upon this blog, go on and read. If you can relate, I'm glad. I hardly find people to relate to these days...
I've always been awkward. Since when? Since birth. My family always described me as someone super shy but when I make friends, I can't seem to stop talking to those friends. Then, the awkward distance comes. I guess you can only take me in small doses.
High School, my teachers push me to talk more. They made me do live reports and stuff to get me to talk. I learned to talk but that didn't take out the awkward in me...
College, I became feisty but still awkward. I just won't let people step all over me. That doesn't mean I wasn't socially weird. As always, people take me in small doses. Heck, family take me in small doses.
I'm now 32. I'm still awkward. I learned how to cope but I'm still awkward. I can walk in front of a crowd and host a gathering of hundreds, tell a speech, say my script but when the mic's away, I'm lost.
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